Note from the Lost Boys

Hi all,

I had dinner with Bob last night, and he said it might be useful if I piped up about my current intentions--clear the air of any opaque rumours or gossip that might be floating around about me or my plans.

First, I have asked for a year off. I need a sabbatical. It is just not possible, when I look at what is coming up in my life between now and April 2010 that it will be possible for Hockey to compete with many, many other priorities.

What are my intents for the 2011 season? I don't know. I really don't know what my life will be like in 15 months.

It is perhaps worth saying... Hockey is a curiosity for me, not an obsession. I follow the economics of it much more than the on ice details, which means the entry draft is the highlight of my season. Getting to Calgary to see you guys is a highlight of my year. Paying attention to the details of hockey beyond that is a challenge for me.

It is further worth emphasizing, that for me, the FUNHL is largely about you guys. Hearing about your families, your lives, your exploits, your thoughts... that's why I do it. You're a curious bunch, with the virtues of being lively and entertaining, and though a $500 trip away, well worth keeping contact with.

To get back to where I started... this is why I've asked for a year off instead of quitting outright. It wouldn't have been difficult to quit. I'll be upfront and, perhaps rashly, confess I considered it.

But the FUNHL--really: you guys--is not an aspect of my life as it is/has existed that I am ready to close the door on. Something inside me just won't let it go, and I've learned to listen to that small voice when it speaks ("and then Pinocchio stomped on the cricket.") I'm not ready to give up.

So, with all sincerity, I would suggest looking for a GM who will be a good fit in the FUNHL, whatever that may mean to you, to take over the Lost Boys for next year. It is my intent to be here on the blog, following the league when I have the chance, and being happy to not be pressured with trades and lineups and all that.

As for what the league is going to do in 2011 when my year off is done. I would suggest taking this one step at a time, summer of 2011 is still quite a ways off. You need someone to manage the Lost Boys Franchise before October, which is coming up soon. If you have filtered for someone who makes the FUNHL a fun place for you to hold on to my franchise this year... then the options available to you in 12 months when/if I come back will be much more appealing and interesting.

Richard.

It's back on?

Hi guys,

Morning news this morning told me that Savard had been hurt. Which I guess means Hockey is back on. I thought they take a break for the olympics?

So you know, I am about two weeks away from having a big writing project I've been working on for two years get published and go to the printers: and that has all my energy. I've been avidly deleting your e-mails and screening your calls--because I can't focus on writing/editing and hockey.

So I'm sure you'll hear back from me closer to the end of March.

Carry on.

Richard.

Trade: Lost Boys & Shadowmen

To the Shadowmen:

Ladd (RFA) CHI LW
Zajac (RFA) NJ C
Hejduk COL RW (inj.)

4th LB Prd 2010

To the Lost Boys

Blake (RFA) TOR LW
Bergeron (RFA) BST C
Okposo (RFA) NYI RW

3rd HL PrD 2010

September 26th: Plans

Hello all,

The 26th is inching forward, so I am beginning my draft plans, and Westjet tickets to Calgary have just crept into the double-digits, so I will shortly be booking my flights. (I'm on this incredible money management system called "don't-carry-your-credit-cards-with-you" which is actually working wonders for my debt repayment success rate. But it means I can't actually book the flight until I get home.

Anyway, just so I am prepared...

1) What are pool fees this year, and who can I send the money to?

2) What are the plans for lunch this year (and do I need to send money to anyone in advance)

3) I'd really like to get a good steak dinner while I'm in Calgary. We have bar food and "The Keg" in Toronto (although, oddly enough we don't have dry fried ribs... except at Swiss Chalet where they aren't as nice as I remember them from Alberta... but I digress.) so: Where should I go for a good steak dinner in Calgary, and does anyone else want to come with me?

(And I'll up the ante for #3, I've had the privelege of eating some fine aged organic Ontario steaks. Fabulous, fabulous steaks they are. So good, in fact, I find it hard to believe that Alberta cattle can be as tasty. So: I'm willing to buy a round of drinks for the table if someone can recommend a steakhouse that will prove me wrong.)

See you in 47 days...

Richard
GM of the Lost Boys

Lost Boys Status update

Hello all,

It would be wrong to start this post with anything other than a hearty thank-you to Bob for essentially running my team for the past season. My life is busy on the other side of the covenant, and whether or not I would continue with running the Lost Boys for another season has been on my mind for months now. I told Bob I'd have an answer to the league before the playoffs were done; and here's it is.

Yes, I'll be back for 2009-2010. I'll be changing my ideal for how I want to run the team, to something much closer to how I can run the team, and I'll be coming to Calgary for the entry draft, since that seems to be key to my participation.

And, although I'm not going to hold the league hostage to my requests, there are some changes that I really do need to see put into the covenant (i.e. whether or not these pass, I'll be in next season.)

Change #1: Let's reduce the number of waiver drafts to one a year. I find these very stressful, for a variety of reasons, and I don't see them as helping my team: one waiver draft will give us all the advantages we can hope to get from the exercise.

Change #2: Let's make waived players from a line up stay around for the remainder of the season. They can be picked up by any team, at any time, once they are off someone's line up. They shouldn't disappear after one week.

These aren't yet formally phrased to fit in the covenant: someone will have a better talent for that than myself; I'd be keen to see these changes implemented for this coming season if that's possible.

I hope all of you have a good summer.

Richard.
(Still) GM Lost Boys.

Hello all and congratulations on the season.

Having been nudged by Bob to post a post-season line up, not getting to it, and then seeing all my would-be picks get swiftly eliminated (I always underestimate Detroit and Pittsburgh it seems) I feel okay.

Special thanks also to Bob for getting my picks up after WD2. I hit a busy stretch, and being in last of top 8 was extra incentive to trade it all away. I am both psyched and intimidated to be going into a PrD with good picks, and having to pay attention to it this year. Shame not to see you make it Brian. Cam, congratulations on hosing me in the Nabokov trade.

I look forward to seeing you all again in September for the main event, and the Lost Boys first FP draft.

Until then, I'd be curious if those of you with magic-8 balls who were prognosticating about who the top 12 picks would be and post it in August 2008, would be good enough to review your picks at the time and compare with who actually got picked, and how they fared. (Cause that would be good reading material).

Ciao,

Richard
GM Lost Boys

Speculation Welcome

So, checking some stats, looking into the injuries, seeing if I've got the best combination of TGs (Oh why can't I draft them?) And Saku Koivu...
Lady Byng winner for most gentlemanly player Saku Koivu...
Lost an eye and recovered from cancer Saku Koivu...
Won't learn French but won't leave Montreal because he's committed to the team Saku Koivu...
is my best bet for TG.

Not only that: He's competitive on my omnivore team for TG.

Can any one explain this? (And when is Mikko coming back?)

Richard.
Lost Boys GM

WD1 & ED2008 Lottery

Hello all,

Bob tells me that the WD has been moved deeper into December. I did not see an easy way of accomodating it on my schedule when it was December 1, and December 8 puts it into the "not going to happen" range. I have a very busy month coming up, and I will likely be out of town.

The good news is I am mildly obsessive about statistics and spreadsheets, and more than happy to put one together to let the league-robot draft for me. Do we have a designated league-robot, so I can discuss what is going to be most reasonable and readable? (Bob has volunteered to verify the accuracy of the league-robot on my behalf.)

Also, when will I know who is waiving whom?

Finally--because it's not worth beating a horse unless it's dead--I would like to retool our algorithm for the ED lottery in 2008 so it reflects how many points a team finished behind first place, rather than what slot they happened to fill in the points table.

Ideally this will encourage everyone to play as best they can right up to the end of the season, and, much like the "tie" points in the Challenge cup--which the league approved in September--it will reflect occasions when two teams are extraordinary close.

I would appreciate it if this could at least be discussed by the league so I can get a feeling for what reception is like out there. My proposed formula to generate chips--I'm open to discussing it--is:

Chips = [('Team's finishing points' - 'Herbivore finishing points') / 25] + 1 , round down.

and the herbivore winner's would be: Predator winner's chips + 1.

Is there anyone strongly opposed?
Is more lobbying necessary?
Are there any other options?

Please discuss.

Richard
GM, Lost Boys.
~~The Lemmings Demand Blood~~

First Real Night of Play

("Saaakuuu.... Saaaakuuuu..." that was the chant all night at the Conrad Black Memorial Arena. Who are we playing in the Challenge cup this week?)

Gah... I... played... Brind'amour... and... benched Walker... Gah! Gah! Gah!

Oh well. Any other notable flops like that? Or is it just me who could have had 4 more points?

Richard.
GM Lost Boys.

PRESS: Lost Boys Introduce Brute Squad

TORONTO—GM and owner of the Lost Boys, Richard Birt introduced this year’s line-up to legions of cheering fans at the Conrad Black Memorial Arena. The Lost Boys were particularly proud of having no less than four players who posted more than 95 penalty minutes in the 2006-07 season. (Fans may dismally remember that previously the Lost Boys had resorted to playing Saku Koivu as TG, shortly before he went on to win the 'Humanitarian of the Year' and “Lady Byng” awards.)

“You not touch Richards.” One new Lost Boy was quoted as saying on this happy occasion.

“Duh... hey... how many teef you got?” remarked another smiling Lost Boy to his team-mate.

Local media noticed how dashing star forward and second-round draft pick and potential TG Mark Savard looked in the Skull and Crossbones. “Heh heh heh… me like scoring” said the erudite Mr. Savard.

When asked for their opinions on Mr. Savard, one of his fellow Lost Boys was quick to state to the press “I said: you not touch Richards!”

With strong forwards, thuggish defensemen, and a top 5 goalie GM Birt was quick to clarify that it won’t all be shut-outs, beatings and scorings on this year’s road to the Predator Cup. “Our players are also engaged in a top-rate educational program to increase their strategical thinking. I can’t really say more than it’s based around a thinking man’s Bridge. You can ask the players for more details”

“Duh... you got any fives?” Said one defenseman.

“BRAARGH!! ALLEN SAY: YOU NOT TOUCH RICHARDS!!!” Another Lost Boy claimed shortly before he was escorted away due to unspecified security concerns.

Fans are looking to another thrilling season for the Lost Boys, this year’s intellectual powerhouse on the FUNHL circuit.

Lost Boys finish draft list!

Three words everyone:

Kiefer... Is... Watching.

I am now ready for 2007/08.

The pred-cup is airplane ready, right?

Am I a cool kid yet?

Bob tells me he has confirmed his move back to the city to happen in late October. Cameron has relocated provinces, Doug is in a new house, and I think Corey sent out a change of address as well.

I too have a new place now, (more downtown, and bigger... for much more money is the trade, but no room-mates) so... two more teams on the list and this becomes moving season for the FUNHL (or... is this just something the Out-of-Calgary conference does?)

Anyway, with me and Bob having 2 bedrooms in Toronto, I'd like to submit a bid for our hosting a waiver draft in 2008. (I figure that's a lot less initial work... show that we're up for hosting ED 2010) Should we book a weekend? :-)

Richard.

(I promise I'll start working on my list soon... Bob can confirm that I've been procrastinating--but talking about it--for a month now, so any day...)

Lost Boys Update

Hello everyone.

First: Congratulations Cam.

Second: Where things are now.

At the end of February, my pretty cool job at the bank came to an end. The department had successfully restructured, and that meant the work I was doing was no longer desired. And though they wished they could keep me what they really wanted was another senior analyst. I am many things, but qualified to be a senior analyst for a bank is not one of them (yet.)

The day my job came to an end... well... give her credit. The Monday after my job ended Jennie broke up with me. Two things to learn: 1) Ouch, cold. Try have more heart than that. 2) It wouldn't have worked. She was a fundamentalist, and things were just going to get messier for us.

And then of course, autopilot turned out to be a fiasco for the Lost Boys, and we finished much lower in the ranks than I had planned, or common sense would suggest. Highlight of the season: I drafted Bieksa.

Still, there is always next season. Plenty of RFAs yet to go.

But, two months unemployed will absolutely savage your wallet, and that is what happened to mine. So my initial savings for Europe vanished as basic grunt jobs failed to come through for me. (I, apparently, have a great drunken rant about employment agencies, and how their economy seems to be based on fairy dust... or is a front for the Genevan mob. Swiss goalies.)

So, the good news is that this all seems to be coming to an end, and I can re-emerge from my desperate state to enjoy watching Ottawa lose the cup. I have two job offers that seem to be bearing fruit--knock on wood--and will give me enough stability to keep going. Not only that, job offers that seem to be lined up with my overall plans and goals.

So, when I get one, I'll let you all know. By the way... these jobs... rock.

Until then, consider which of your RFAs you're willing to trade me. As far as I'm concerned, it's not possible to have too many.

When do we know draft order?

Richard
GM of the Lost Boys.

+++

Dum spiro, spero.
While I breathe, I hope.

Season in Review: The Lost Boys

The Lost Boys made their FunHL debut in 2006-07 and the reviews were mostly positive, still this is a team with the potential to do great things down the road and that process is already underway. The Jolly Roger hasn't be raised to the top of the Predator Cup standings just yet but that is the goal and if the team's first season is any indication it is a goal that may be realized sooner than anyone might expect.

FPs: The Lost Boys joined the league by taking over one of the most cursed franchises in FunHL history. The season before the Barbarians was the name the team went by and they had managed one of their better historical showings by finishing in 9th position but only 10pts out of last. They inherited two FPs who both had surprising seasons: c Joe Sakic (100pts) had a season to remember posting his best season in 6 years at the age of 37 and lw I.Kovalchuk (76pts) who took a serious step backwards in what was expected to be a season where he would dominate. Going in, the expectation was that Sakic would need to find a new home, and soon, while Kovalchuk would be the cornerstone around which the Lost Boys would be built. Sakic was dealt and Kovalchuk, rightly, remains a key component of the Lost Boys' future but had their point totals been reversed at the end of the season it would have been much closer to everyone's expectations going in.

Draft: The Lost Boys had, with an Omnivore baseline of over 953pts, the 6th best team leaving the draft. A very respectable showing for a first effort. Their first four picks clearly demonstrate the Lost Boy's emphasis on building from the back-end out: S.Gonchar (67pts), M.Schneider (52pts), a match on L.Visnovsky (58pts) and a reasonable gamble on D.Hasek (108.73 pts). Gonchar was the highest pointing offensive defensman in the league while all three would end up in the top 15. Hasek, taken in the fourth round, was a top 6 goaltender and the best available by the time the Lost Boys made their selection.

The emphasis on defense and goaltending did leave them a little thin up front. Other than their two FPs, the Lost Boys only selected two forwards who scored more than 60pts: lw R.Smyth (68pts but on pace for 79!) and rfa c S.Koivu (75pts) one of the better selections in the draft going in the 11th round. C.Conroy (37pts) was a big disappointment and M.Knuble (54pts) was beset by injury troubles. While the big three on defense excelled for the Lost Boys, the bottom 5 were merely adequate with no rfa defenders exceeding 30pts. The Lost Boys would end up matching on six rfas over the course of the draft, they may break that total with this upcoming draft but as both Conroy and Knuble were rfa matches last season, it will be important to make sure that those rfas are matched judiciously.

Moving Forward: The Lost Boys set themselves a goal of being in the top half of the pool and of finishing ahead of the Severed Heads. Unfortunately they fell short of both but they did lay the foundation for a much better outing next season. Their real test will be in converting their potential into production - sometimes easier said than done.

FPs: The key super-star for the Lost Boys is I.Kovalchuk (76pts). In many respects his season, he was ranked 11th among all left wingers, was a disappointment but the fact remains that he is a phenomenal talent who should rebound with a great offensive outburst next season and for years to come. He is a keeper. The other Lost Boy FP by the end of the season was center Brad Richards (70pts), 20th best among centers. Like Kovalchuk, Richards' year was a disappointment but as some GMs remain skeptical about whether Richards should be an FP in any event the issue of what to do with him becomes more difficult. At best, the Lost Boys have gone from Joe Sakic (100pts) to a younger version of Burnaby Joe who should rebound from a poor season. At worst, they have a solid but unspectacular #2 or #3 pivot and need to upgrade. Either way, there seems to be no immediate need to decide his fate at this entry draft and Richards looks to be a Lost Boy for a while yet.

Prospects: When it became clear that the Lost Boys were not going to win it all, the rebuilding began in earnest. Every trade would need to include rfas and/or prospects. In the end, the team had amassed a good crop of both. Returning p4 goaltender M.Gerber (32.51pts), p3 center C.Bourque (0pts) and p2 left winger A.Mikhnov (0pts) probably won't be back next season. Mikhnov couldn't crack a very weak Oiler line-up and returned to Russia and while Bourque might have some upside at some point, other prospects are just, well, better prospects so he falls victem to the numbers game.

The more established prospects on the Lost Boys' list: p3 center M.Koivu (54pts) and p2 center A.Vermette (39pts) might just be able to contribute next season. P3 right winger E.Fehr (3pts) looks like he could reach his potential any day now, but his time is quickly running out. Which leaves the three p2s with the most potential to impact the Lost Boys' fortunes, if only down the line, in defensemen T.Wishart (0pts) in San Jose and I.Vishnevskiy (0pts) in Dallas. The gem of the collection is Bruins p2 goalie T.Rask (0pts) who is ranked #14 in the Hockey News' future watch.

Prospect Draft: One area where the Lost Boys did not accumulated futures was the 2007 Prospect Draft. The Lost Boys are down their own first and fourth picks and have no picks from anyone else. The only reason some of the potential dropped prospcts may get another shot with the team is the concern that they may be the best players available given their poor draft picks.

RFAs: With no less than 16 rfas, by far the most of any team in the FunHL, the Lost Boys are gearing up for a lot of tough decisions on draft day and, they hope, a lot of steals. The list is lead by two ageless wonders in lw A.Brunette (83pts) and c R.Brindamour (82pts). Both will likely see their production drop next year but should be matched unless the bids are too high. Similarly, c S.Koivu (75pts) and rw J.Langenbrunner (60pts) can be servicable additions if they are not overbid on by other GMs. Neither will likely go on a tear but, barring injury, should be able to repeat their production. In goal the Lost Boys have snapped up a pair of Sharks in E.Nabokov (79.17pts) and V.Toskala (58.91pts), though it is possible only one remains with San Jose next season he will be a great number one pick and should be matched regardless of when he's bid upon.

Amongst the remaining forwards there will be some tough calls. There is rw S.Walker (51pts) who will be hard pressed to increase his production, lw M.Rucinsky (33pts) who prorates out to 52pts but may not have another big year in him while rw Jason Williams (32pts) had a very disappointing season in Detroit. Williams may be worth matching with a late pick in the hopes that he could surprise but only as a fourth-liner. Another disappointing rw rfa is A.Carter (28pts) who, with the right line-mates, has shown he is capable of putting up decent numbers but who may have worn out his welcome with the Lost Boys. The sleeper forward for the Lost Boys may be lw A.Kotalik (38pts). His numbers prorate out to 47pts which would still be a notable drop from his 62pt season last year but the young winger is big, strong and has a nose for the net. Any reasonable bid ought to be matched as he has the potential to have a real breakout season.

On defense, the Lost Boys could field a solid corps with only a few additions to this group. M.Rozsival (40pts) and R.Hamrlik (38pts) are very dressable and D.Morris (25pts +28.75 tg pts) has number 6 offensive numbers with top end toughness. P.Nummelin (20pts) is a 35-year old rookie and while he prorates out to 32pts, there are probably better options available. One of those options might be M.Michalek (28pts) who just completed his 2nd full season, he's young and talented and should eclipse his totals next year with a presumably improved Coyotes squad.

Overall: The Lost Boys are looking to improve in their second season and seem well positioned to do so. They had a solid draft their first time out and, so long as they are judicious in matching their large collection of rfas, seem likely to draft an even stronger team their next time out. The pieces are in place for a very solid performance next year so the key will be living up to the heightened expectations. They will - and then some.

Lost Boys seek GMing advice for 2008

Hello all,

I got my degree, and a cozy-enough job this year, and I've been evaluating what to do with my life next year. As some of you know, I was considering Calgary and pursuing technical certification in my field of interest. But, I don't drive, and having escaped school, am not so keen to return to it.

Anyway, life without irony--or at least long-term circular logic--would not be life as I understand it. Way back when I was a wee paduwan of 16 or so, I was told by Bob that what I really needed to do was go and see the world a little. I didn't want to at the time, and scoffed at the notion, fairly certain that Toronto was all I needed.

Well, a decade has passed (Friday was my birthday, I'm 26) and, it seems, life has finally gotten around to putting me in a position of actually wanting to see the world, and proving Bob right. I need greater and grander things. My heritage qualifies me for a UK, and thus, EU passport... and London's Calling. (The Clash, 1979)


So this is my situation to the league.

1) I want to keep the Lost Boys and stay in the FUNHL. I've been pursuing a strategy for next year's draft (RFA's over PrDs), and have finally gotten my FPs to the point where I don't need to worry about them for another couple decades.

But:

2) How do people feel about GM participating on a 10 hour time difference? Calling me will be tough, and participating in 4 hour WDs that start at 10 p.m. is going to be rough. I also won't be able to show for the ED or PrD in any meaningful way. If I choose to travel frequently, routine access to my e-mail to submit line ups and the like will become difficult too.


So, options as I see them:

a) I participate from Europe, send my spreadsheets to the appropriate people to execute my drafts as best they can, trade through e-mail, and continue my blog-based snarkiness, just on a 10 hour time difference instead of a 2 hour time difference. My strategy continues unabated.

b) I get a co-GM to help manage the Lost Boys while I'm gone. This'll be someone who you can call about trades, will get line-ups in, and can participate in the drafts. This will also give the league an option of training a potential future GM without running a guppy pool. (I'm told this was done when someone... Collin?... went to Australia)

c) The FUNHL starts to look for a new GM to take over "Franchise 11." I stop offering PrDs for RFAs. Though... let me say if we go with this option: can I come back when I'm back on the continent?

My preference is option "a" but figured I'd throw it out to the league now for due judgment and consideration. If we go with "b" I have a friend in Toronto who really loves and knows her hockey, and deserves a pool of this calibre to splash around in, even if only for a year. Though, none of you know her, so that may prove an issue.

I may need to be persuaded from practicing dark magic on your FPs if you go with option "c".


Alright... now go ahead and opine. I don't leave until September.

Richard
GM of the Lost Boys.

(Happy to buy your RFAs, now, or in June)

Trade: Lost Boys-Shadowmen

Lost Boys invest in future, Shadowmen invest in present:

To Shadowmen:
Sakic C COL (FP)
Visnovsky D LA
Avery L NYR

To Lost Boys:
Richards C FLA (FP)
Zidlicky D NSH
Kotalik L BUF (RFA)


Bob please confirm over e-mail for the benefit of those. Brian, any chance of getting an updated master circulated before sunday?

Richard

Lost Boys await injuries/better offers, file line up from poor memory

Hello all,

I have no easy reference to my team, but I know I didn't get around to filing a line up for my team. Not having a reference to said team here at work, these are my changes to the previously filed line up. (I don't expect to get home till well past the deadline tonight, so am doing this pre-emptively.)

Play: D Vinsnovsky, Liles & Roszival, Hill as TG,
bench Wideman and uh... uh... One of my equally less memorable Ds (Any suggestions here are welcome)

Also, I am playing Langenbrunner, right?


Richard.